Quite frequently mothers hope I can help them by phone or email. Or even by facebookpost.
Not because I don’t want to, but because it would not be real help. It would be impossible to do anything beyond standard advice. And if a standard answer would have helped, you would not have needed more help. Because there are plenty of people to help you: kraamzorg, verloskundige, nurses and consultatiebureau, and of course family, friends and the internet.
And when all these options do not lead to comfortable and enjoyable breastfeeding, that’s when I step in. Because sometimes how breastfeeding looks does not add up to how it feels. Everyone can tell you the latch looks fine, and yet it hurts. Similar to buying shoes: they can look fantastic on your feet and yet may hurt your feet.
A nipple and a finger are fairly similar in size and sensitivity. Compare pinching the top of your finger to pinching further along: much less sensitive. Anda direct effect on bloodflow, which compares to milkflow while latching on.
Two millimeters can make a big difference on a finger. And on a nipple too!
Your nipple should look round and normal after feeding. If your nipple looks flat and/or white when your baby lets go feeding is quite likely uncomfortable, and the milkflow has also been impaired. Possibly leading to long feedingsessions, restless baby and sore nipples.
So consider: if the standard advice does not help, get someone to work with you. Don’t settle for discomfort. Breastfeeding is worth investing. Don’t invest in exhaustion and perseverance, invest in yourself, your baby and your mutual enjoyment.